Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I lost the right to judge tonight
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Randomize
