Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Randomize
