Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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