In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
