can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
