I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
