Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry youthanize hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(816): View more from Missouri

My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.

Fav 4 1251 1351
share tweet
(925): View more from California

You make homosexuality sound like a cult.

Fav 20 1235 3029
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(714): View more from California

i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?

Fav 17 4517 1335
share tweet
(703): View more from Virginia

im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off

Fav 63 1699 10077
share tweet
(814): View more from Pennsylvania

he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..

Fav 37 7702 2473
share tweet
(212): View more from New York

yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"

Fav 9 7836 1461
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever

Fav 11 5998 1090
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(775): View more from Nevada

My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case

Fav 14 1963 1037
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(423): View more from Tennessee

Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.

Fav 0 85 16
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT