why do cheetos always look like penises
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
