How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
