okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
