i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize