All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
