I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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