he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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