i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
