So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
