High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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