It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
