Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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