Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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