Duck Duck Cougar?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
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