I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
