party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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