i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
