Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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