this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
But theres a keg here and me gusta
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
