To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
