Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
