Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
