doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Pants 0. Shit 1.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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