I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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