Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
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