i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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