It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize