we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
