U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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