i would punch a child for taco bell
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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