i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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