I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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