This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
