Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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