Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
