I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize