I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
