and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
But we have bathrooms and they dont
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize