Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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