i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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