have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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