I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
