I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
We had to coat check the pizza.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
