If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
